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Training Day

Well Cheri from SDWR is back to help with more training for Rocky. Due to his being sick,  we lost a lot of good training because we had to keep him isolated from the side of the house where we spend much of our day, cause he would “go potty” without notice. 

We’ve had some ups and downs with him… And of course the second Cheri stepped in the house,  He straightened back up and got right back in line, once again making liars out of us!

Ever notice how the kids do that too? Keep them home from school due to fever or vomiting etc. and when they get to the doctors office they’re feeling fine and break dancing making a liar out of you? Well apparently even the dogs are in on the action.

We sent the Tot to school even though he’s supposed to be here for training,  but since we’re working on basic obedience training, we figured the 3 hours he’ll be present from when he gets back and when Cheri leaves will be sufficient.

Here are some pics from yesterday’s training. Enjoy.

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Wifey & Rocky leaving how to walk

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Cheri & Wifey & Rocky

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The Tot & Rocky

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Wifey & The Tot

Saturday we took the kids to a festival the next town over. Monkey Boy wanted to race in a go kart race they held. So we bought him a go cart we found on craigslist and entered him in. I spray painted it black and painted Batman symbols all over it. He loved it. We were finishing it up the night before the festival and him and I got to hang out in the basement painting it and watching Let It Shine on Netflix. It was a good night.

MB and has Batmobile

MB and has Batmobile

Then the next morning him and I took the cart in the Jeep and went out there at 8:30 in the morning for practice runs…man was it FREAKING COLD!!!! I can’t believe how cold it was in the end of April!!! And of course I had left my hat and gloves in my desk drawer at work!

Well the rest of this tribe met us there at 11:00 a.m. despite the Monster In Laws usual idiocy prior to leaving and Aspie Teen’s passive resistance ridiculousness that he pulls every time we make him leave the house and the fact that I had to run back home and drop off my wife’s van keys which were in my coat pocket from the night before. (Yeah THAT went over well).

Well the day was going well unit the To had a (I shit you not) hour long meltdown, because he couldn’t race the cart down the hill in the race. So he sat in the cart and Monkey Boy couldn’t race in HIS cart and he couldn’t use HIS helmet (everything is his don’t ya know?).

The Tot making his stand

The Tot making his stand

He didn’t calm down until I let him go down the hill in the cart on the other side of the track, wearing the helmet of course…then he was happy tot again…..I could’ve killed him!

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Me carrying the Tot back UP the hill

Monkey Boy even entered a pie eating contest! He’s never even eating pie as far as I can tell! And he got his pic in the paper looking too cool too!

Eating pie with perfect hair!

Eating pie with perfect hair!

I don’t know what the locals thought of our autistic family…but the kids had fun and that was the whole point of it anyway.

Looks Can Be Deceiving

Today my wife,  the Monster in Law,  Chunky, Tantrum Tot and I ventured off to a thrift store the next town over. Now it goes without saying that by the time we got in the van to go I needed a drink (or 30).

Here are some pics from the venture.

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They had this sign there, I thought it was awesome

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The Tot wouldn't take his helmet off the whole time

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The Tot & Chunky playing with their new toys

From these pics it looks like the day went all nice and calm and the little monsters were actually cherubs wouldn’t you?

The pics don’t show the amount of times I had to count to 10 or walk away or chase after chunky cause he bolted, or how loud he screamed, or how many times I had to avert a meltdown by the Tot. 

They don’t show the frustration, or the anger, the being fed up, the overwhelming urge to smash things simply because there is nothing you can do.

Everyone’s journey with autism, everyone’s experiences, everyone’s ability to cope is as different as how many different presentations there are of autism itself. 

Remember that everyone deserves the benefit of a doubt and everyone deserves understanding as well as compassion.  Be they autistic or Neuro typical. And no-one deserves to be judged.

Chunky Monkey

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Enjoying the sun finally!

Chunky is now 19 months old and is completely non – verbal.  He is happy most of the time though. AND he actually communicates with us!  He will bring us to the table and grunt and squeals till we guess what he wants.

When he is happy he will squeal and laugh with such cuteness!  He gets very “flappy” when he’s happy, and will walk around flapping his hands like crazy. Or he’ll run around in circles and make himself fall over, or go running across the floor on his tip toes.   And he’s got the cutest giggle ever. 

Of course the flip side of that is that he has the most eat piercing yells too. But for the most part, he’s a happy Chunky. 

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He’s never had a haircut and his hair is completely out of control. I can barely get him to eat anything most days and he hates bring “tied” in his high chair. He’s starting to play with his brother’s toys and Netflix keeps him occupied for hours.  He walks around with a baby blanket all day and won’t go to sleep without it.  He reminds me of Linus from the Peanuts gang.

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I’m rapidly losing hope that he won’t be on the spectrum though.  In fact his mom and I are trying to get the process started to test him. I guess I’ll continue to be the only N.T in this house!

Happy Birthday Aspie Teen!

Aspie Teen turned the big 16 today!

Right this second he’s in DMV taking the exam for his drivers permit!!!

Lord I don’t know if I’m strong enough for this! 

But do me a favor and leave him a comment here wishing him a happy birthday!

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Aspie Teen Gets Deep!

Today,  Aspie Teen and I went to the movies.  We saw the movie Chappie. I had never heard of it buy he said he had seen the preview and wanted to see it.  I read the description and watched the trailer and it seemed ok,  so my wife valiantly threw herself on her sword and stayed home with Monkey Boy,  Tantrum Tot and Chunky Monkey so he and I could go see it. 

The movie, while good, was kind of dark and a little disturbing.  (Warning!  Spoiler Alert coming! ) In the movie they discovered how to transfer a human consciousness into a robot body. 

This was disturbing for me and him. And while we were walking back to the car,  we were discussing what it was about the movie that disturbed us.  We both agreed that switching a human consciousness into a machine was the thing that we found disturbing.

Then Aspie Teen said the deepest thing. .. he said “Yeah dad, if humans really learned how to do that it would upset the balance in the universe…I mean there are evil people who need to die, and if they could be brought back the world would never be rid of them. ”

I was astounded!  It upset me for moralistic reasons, but Aspie Teen took it to a whole other level!!! And he was right,  but I never thought of that! What an amazing kid I tell you!

The God Honest Truth

We are going through so much right now.  I can’t even begin to express it all.  Overwhelming doesn’t come close to describing it. Mind numbing, terrifying,  dread filling terror comes closer but doesn’t begin to cover it either. 

I listen to my son’s voices and I’m scared to death for them.  I touch briefly on this blog about the struggles off raising three autistic boys,  but I never go too deep into detail. I can’t.  Every time I think I’m getting a handle on something… that I’ve made the tiniest bit of progress,  the bottom falls out,  the situation goes sideways, the shit hits the proverbial fan and it leaves me utterly incapacitated,  the breath knocked out of me and the fear is so real it has a voice.

And the voice says your going to lose them.  Your going to be defeated,  you’re kids will be lost and there is nothing you can do about it.  The cards are stacked against you, this is a fight you can’t win and if you try you will get the ever loving shit kicked out of you and you will go through so much pain in the process you may as well lay down on a set of train tracks and wait for the end to come because it will be easier than what’s in store for you.

And I want to lay down on those tracks and give up.  Because I’m already beat the hell up. I’ve already gone eight rounds with other adversaries.  My days are already all jacked up and I was already having problems holding onto any kind of hope at all. So building myself up to go that ninth round seems like the hardest thing to do in life,  and yeah part of me is like why even bother? 

What’s the use? Your kids don’t know anything is even wrong,  your family doesn’t know anything is wrong,  this ridiculously broken system which is supposedly of the people,  for the people and by the people has been horribly and irrevocably broken. There is no outlet or help or justice if you can’t afford to pay out the ass for it.So there is no hope or help too be had from them.

So yeah I don’t want to climb back into the ring with Goliath. I’m already bleeding from a hundred different wounds and my blood and will are seeping out of my heart and soul.

But if I don’t pick up the fight again who will? Who will be the champion for my family? True I’m a beat down washed up has been who’s better days are long behind him, and as such I’m not much of a champion, but I’m all they got.

So I guess I’ll pick myself up, climb back in the ring for that ninth round and hope I’m good enough to last it out till the end, whatever that end may be. I’ll go one more round, try a few more combinations, and pray for some kind of, any kind of really, victory. And maybe, just maybe I’ll take some of those bastards with me.

Like Rocky Balboa said “I ain’t heard no bell yet”…

Tonight we decided to be brave.  My job has an employee’s club that from time to time will host events in the local community.  Well we moved out here with the sincere desire to be more involved in this club so we can maybe make some friends and not be house hermits anymore.

Well the employees club sponsored a Tubing Night at the local ski mountain.  We actually thought we missed it because it got rescheduled due to extreme cold.  Today I found out last minute that it was rescheduled for tonight.

Someone please tell me that I am not the only person who goes insane trying to get the kids out of the house?  Aspie Teen did his usual passive resistive thing which resulted in the Tot having a meltdown while I was trying to get him and Chunky ready. 

Monkey Boy was dressed and ready to go,  but the Teen always drags his feet and causes chaos whenever he is forced to come anywhere with us. This time by refusing to help the Tot with his game.  So we pile a screaming Tot,  a squirming Chunky,  a resistant Teen,  Rocky the Service Dog,  a harassed and overwhelmed wife and me into the van and off we go.

Well we got the Tot called down on the way , got there and got Monkey Boy and Aspie Teen going down the mountain while my wife and I stayed in the lodge with the Tot and Chunky cause the Tot wanted a cheeseburger. 

Rocky was great, and it was a pleasant night although we didn’t really interact with too many co workers. .. since we’re still new here, we haven’t really broken into the social circle yet.  But all was going well until we decided to take the Tot up the hill so he could tube down.

Well he decided he really liked the lift which took them up the hill.  So much in fact that he didn’t want to stop at the point where he was supposed to and decided to throw a fit on his mom.

Aspie Teen came to the lodge and told me to go help his mother. .I couldn’t figure out where she was so I headed up the hill to find her.  I almost died cause by the time my fat ass got up the hill I was so exhausted I could’ve fallen over and easily rolled down the hill. (I walked up the hill).

Well by the time I walked back down the hill and found them,  the Tot was in full blown meltdown mode.  I had to carry him to van. .. my co-workers did see part of the meltdown and seemed to take it graciously,  but we’ll see what happens when I get back to work on Monday.

Ok so I’ve mentioned before how I love the mall… always have always will I guess. So after being here two months we decided to venture forth into the brave unknown and visit the larger area which is about 45 minutes to an hour away from us to go visit the mall and see what other stores were in the area.  Particularly to see if they had a book store where Aspie Teen could go hang out, cause he’s sorely missing being able go do that like he used to in SC.

It’s about 11:30 a.m. when we made that brilliant decision.  Finally after the usual whining and complaining from all the boys,  and the wrestling to get them in the van,  we’re off to see the mall,  the wonderful wonderful mall!

Well since no-one had eaten yet,  we had to go through McDonald’s drive thru first.  Well the Tot already had it in his mind that we were going to sit and eat there instead of driving thru. 
And since it was already 1:00 p.m now, (getting my kids ready and out the house can drive you to drink before you actually go anywhere), we had to go through the drive thru which by the way was the original plan. 

The Tot though had already planned something else in his mind.  So now he was in full on hitting, screaming,  melt down mode. Which lasted, I shit you not,  the ENTIRE drive to the mall.  He wouldn’t pet Rocky,  and wouldn’t let Monkey Boy touch him either. 

M.B. was in the back of the van with the Tot and the Tot’s meltdown was really causing him to wig out!  Also since we now live in a mountainous region, our ears were popping like crazy due to the elevations and M.B. didn’t know why and he was miserable. 

Anyway M.B. was wigging out real bad and in full whine mode,  the Tot was melting down in epic proportions,  wifey was freaking out and nagging me about how fast I was driving as usual…. it’s a wonder we made it to the mall in one piece!

Once we got there however,  the Tot called down almost immediately.  He held Rocky’s leash,  and walked happily through the mall!  That was until we got to Game Stop… Then it was quick,  re direct quickly! 

We redirected,  got him back on Rocky’s lead and got him and Chunky to some rides. .. Then to the arcade. .. where I was so impressed with Rocky I gotta say.  For that being such a loud chaotic environment,  He didn’t do one thing wrong.  He stayed by the Tot’s side the entire time.  He was actually amazing to see.  He was the Tot’s personal guard dog. 

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M.B. the Tot and Chunky Monkey

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Ricky the Wonder/Service/Guard Dog watching the Tot play.

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The Tot, M.B. , wifey and Rocky in the arcade

When it was time to go the Tot left with no problems either. At one point we went to Dicks  Sporting Goods store and the Tot took off.  My wife said Rocky find the Tot!  And he took off like a shot and found him!  We’ve only been teaching him this for a few days too! 

Of course when we went out to the van it was snowing,  so the trip home was a very nervous one,  but the Tot,  M.B. and everyone else had a very mellow ride due to or utilizing the travel DVD player we had just bought a movie for!

All in all,  it wasn’t a relaxing day,  but it was definitely am improvement from some other mall nightmares I can regale you with.

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